I Overanalyze

The other day I was driving in my car, listening to the radio and doing what I always do: thinking too much. "Wish You Were Here" by Pink Floyd came on the radio. Everyone should know this song, and if it is not familiar to you, it is definitely worth youtubing. This song always reminds me of a friend I lost over ten years ago. She had a t-shirt that she wore all the time that had the Pink Floyd rainbow prism on the front, and said "Wish you were here" on the back. For the past ten years, when this song has been played, all I can think is "oh, how I wish you were here." I think about my friend. I sing along. I wonder if she's around, in spirit, watching me.

This time was different. While I was singing, I started really thinking about the lyrics. It was the part of the song where they ask "Did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in the cage" that really got my mind to over-analyzing.

Before, I always took those lyrics at their metaphorical meaning, or at least what I thought was the metaphorical meaning. Did you exchange a small time of hardship for a lifetime of being stuck? That is what the lyrics always meant to me. That would be a foolish thing to do, no doubt. But I have been thinking about the war, and veterans, and how our country doesn't seem to treat the people who fight our wars like one might thing we should treat them. It hit me, there are a lot of people who didn't even make the trade. There are a lot of people who took more than a walk on part in the war, whether it be in Afghanistan or Iraq (and that's just talking about recently) and still ended up with a lead roll in the cage. It sucks.

I used to date a guy whose Grandfather had been in the Army for years, fought in the Korean War, gave the entire prime of his life to the Army. By the time I knew him, he was in his late 80's. Though he was still a staunch Republican, he would tell you any day of the week that the Army had screwed him on his pension. He lived the life of a miser, never buying new socks until the ones that he had were ridden with holes, and using his coffee filters over and over until they began to literally disintegrate. The younger years of his life were stressful and filled with violence and hardship and sacrifice, all brought on by his service his country. The older years of his life, the ones that were supposed to be golden, were stressful. Though not filled with violence, they were certainly filled with hardship and sacrifice, due to his constant inability to afford the things that one needs to get by. The things that he thought he would have when he agreed to serve in the first place..

I was born in 1981, and raised by some pretty liberal folks. I knew several Vietnam vets, and I was taught that many of them did not get the respect that they deserve. I think that much of my generation was taught the same, that there was a shame hanging over our country for the way that Vietnam veterans had been treated, and that vets were people that deserved more honor and respect that your average Joe on the street. Without a doubt, after 9-11-2001, my generation saw this country go full tilt into an abundance a patriotism. There seemed to be a silent concensus among Americans that we'd be damned before we repeated the disservice that had fallen upon the veterans from Vietnam. Flags flew like we'd never seen before, and when the United States went to war in Afghanistan and Iraq, we all thought that for sure we would be better to the veterans this go round. As a whole, the citizens of the country are. They have remained patriotic for the most part, and it's not hard to find a story on the news about something nice that has been done for a veteran, or the importance of healthcare and whatnot for our veterans. As usual with the media, I have noticed that if you talk to some veterans you might find that the media has candy coated what it is like for them to come home. While there are a lot opportunities, both charitable and from the government, to help veterans, I don't think that most of us realize that the government services available to veterans are few and not only are a lot of veterans not getting their just dues for their sacrifices, they are downright getting screwed.

If a veteran of our involvement in any war wants healthcare, they must get it at a VA hospital. While there are a lot of great services done at VA hospitals nationwide, to say their are gaps would be an understatement. In the town where I live, which is not very small, we do not even have a VA medical facility and the closest one is over 30 miles away. In the event of an emergency, a car accident per se, a veteran will be taken to the local hospital and will be billed and treated just the same as any person with no insurance. They will leave with a bill in hand.

Then there is the GI Bill. A great idea and resource for veterans, especially the ones who qualify for the Post 9-11 GI Bill benefits, but it has its gaps and loopholes. For example, a veteran has to use their benefits within ten years of discharge from service or the benefits disappear. Regardless of how long a veteran has served, they will only qualify for 36 months of benefits, which will run out should they want to get a masters or doctorate degree. So it seems that the education that is promised to our vets comes with limits what the government will help you to achieve.

Another thing that gets to me is the lack of veterans discounts. I know this sounds trite. Not really, though, when you think of the fact that police officers get discounts in almost every restaurant that you can think of. I think its good that police get discounts. They protect and serve the public every day. So why not show the same respect to the guy in the other booth that spent a year or maybe more in the desert of Afghanistan, sleeping in a tent with bugs that you and I can not even imagine, who missed the birth of his child or the funeral of his mother while he was there? Did he not put his life on the line just as much as a police officer. I need to look up some statistics to see what the likelyhood of death on the job is for a police officer as compared to that of a service member.

I have a friend who was serving in Afghanistan while his wife took up an extra-marital affair with their next door neighbor. When he returned, a divorce and custody battle ensued. Even though he has proof that his wife and her new boyfriend, the neighbor, are abusive to his daughter, he has not been able to get custody, or even partial custody, of his child. As a matter of fact, he is not even allowed to contact his little girl at this point in time. He couldn't call her on her birthday last month, and will not be able to send her a Christmas gift, or else he will be charged in Contempt of Court for violating the custody order that has been handed down by the Judge presiding. Seems like a hard pill to swallow, and he would tell you it is so hard to swallow that it is stuck in his throat and he can feel it every passing minute of every day. His wife has managed to obtain a free attorney, but despite the sacrifices he made for this country, he has been unable to find one single attorney that will help him for free, and has spent tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees during his fight to obtain custody of his daughter. A fight that seems unlikely to end soon. He has written letters to every congressman and senator that he can find, all to no avail. No one seems to want to help. Disheartening to say the least, especially when you think of all the help that he has done for other, people he will never know, all to end up losing a large amount of time with the person he loves the most, his little girl.

I guess the point I am making is that many people chose not to trade a walk on part in the war, but instead chose to take a giant part in the war so that the rest of us could avoid a lead role in the cage, so to speak. And these very people have come home to a find that THEY are the ones with the lead role in the cage. Finding a lack of help and resources to help them transition back in to civilian life. Often, they come home to find that they have lost much more than they gained, and have less than what they had when they left.

That lyric used to make me sad. To think of the poor fools that so lacked sight of the big picture that they would exchange a small hardship for a life of entrapment. Now it make me more than sad. To think of all the people that took a large part in the war so that the rest of us would never see the cage, and now feel that they will live in it for the rest of their lives. Even if they break free from the cage, many of their lives are forever changed because of the way that they were treated when the came home from the war, more so than because of what happened while they were there.

While our soldiers are away, they wish the were here. When they get home, unfortunately many of them only find that while they thought they were doing the right thing for themselves and their country, their lead role in the war also landed them in with a lead role in the cage that they did not even know existed. How do we fix this? I don't know, but something needs to change.